Switching gears here; let me tell you an awesome story. Well, it was awesome for me, so I hope you can join in my gratitude for it, as it really has changed my life.
At the end of this semester I was in a fix. Final exams came down hard on my sleep schedule, energy levels, and overall well-being. I was sick, I was tired, I was busy, and yet I was simply just like every other college student trying to scrape by with the best possible GPA for their given situation. I had a full tuition scholarship to maintain, and a grad school dream keeping me going, so I worked; I worked hard. I worked on remembering which genus of over fifty species of bacteria, protists, and fungi belonged to which symptoms and characteristics; I worked on head snaps and a strong frame while dancing tango; I worked on memorizing quotes from Church leaders and gospel principles I had studied throughout the semester; I worked on improving my knowledge of the history of dance and the progression of styles from lineage-based societies to modern, ballroom, ballet, and others of today; I worked on understanding the laws and equations behind momentum, energy, torque, waves, and heat. I worked so hard, and yet I could not do it. Not on my own.
My first moment of insufficiency arrived: I needed an 83% in order to obtain an A in my four credit Microbiology class. I felt like I would never be able to remember and understand all of the required material in the amount of time given, and I knew if I tried I would burn myself out before I even took the exam. In my time of trouble, I turned to the sky. I prayed. I prayed to be able to do my best, to have an open mind, and to accept the grade I would receive without beating myself up. And then I took the test. After, I handed in my exam, and walked out and looked up at the BYU Testing Center screen for my score: I got an 84%. I got the A. I almost cried.
My second moment came along after I had partially burned myself out studying for General Physics 1. I love math and science, but have never taken a physics course before, so I did not know that this subject somehow did not come easily to me. It was humbling, really. But the final exam staring me in the face was more terrifying than anything. I knew the highest grade I could receive in the course was a B, which I was not too pleased about, but if I could just get a 67% on the final, then I would not have to face a B-. I know, I know; how hard could it be to get a 67%? Well, for me, it was hard to do anything good in that class. So I prayed again. I prayed my little heart out. And I took that test and tried my best, and almost four hours later my hand shook as I gave my bubble sheet to the scanner. I got a 69%. I got the B. This time, I really did cry.
They say the third time is a charm. I don't actually know what that means, but in this case it was my third moment of need that let me learn the lesson being taught this whole time. I had finished all of my finals and proceeded to calculate my final GPA, trying to see if I would be able to retain my scholarship. I calculated once, twice, thrice, but the numbers stayed the same. I didn't meet the cut-off point. Had all of my hard work been for nothing? The answer to this question is "no", because my GPA does not determine my self-worth or talents or ability to serve the world, but I wasn't about to give up. I emailed professors, looked through past assignments, and read through all of the syllabi to see if there was any chance. If just one of my two A-'s was changed to an A, I would have the GPA necessary to be eligible for full tuition scholarship reconsideration. Guess what I did? You got it, I got down on my knees and offered up a humble prayer.
I knew this was not the end of the world, and I knew I could most certainly survive if this didn't work out, but I also knew that the God I worship is my Heavenly Father. I know He cares about what I care about, no matter how small or trivial. I know He listens to my prayers earnestly and diligently, and helps and guides me in every way. I know He helped me before, but it was here I was unsure He would help me again so soon. Hadn't I used up all of my prayers? Didn't my prayer life bar need to be recharged? Couldn't you only have so many crisis-conquering miracles in a period of time before they needed to take a vacation? This is seriously the way I thought. Odd? Yeah, I usually am, but I learned my lesson this time. Prayer has no life bar. Prayer never stops being an effective way of communicating with our Father in Heaven, no matter how many times a day you use it, even in desperation; especially in desperation.
My prayers were answered, and I am now eligible for reconsideration for a full tuition scholarship. It is by grace I have seen miracles, and it is by grace I will continue to be blessed. Even if my prayers were answered in a different way, meaning even if I did not end this semester in the way I desired, I know that all things happen for a reason. I know that as my desires become aligned with His will, I will be happy no matter what comes my way.
I've just got to keep praying.
I agree wholeheartedly! :)
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